back to the drawing board

Bad nights give u a chance to re-evaluate. and I would have to say. Maybe I'm coming off as too timid and nice.

I think its time to really play hardball for a while.

For Tuesday, I'm going to neg. I'm going to use some cocky funny. and I'm not going to use any direct.

NO TOMORROW

Live as if its your last day. No regrets. No tomorrow.

Log

Saturday

Maloneys (white, 2 white, 2 Asians(blowout), 3 set, 2 Asians (lost interest), 2 asians (lost interest))

Red Box (julie, yuki, 3 asians, 2 sitting down, black dress, vanessa)

Maloneys (mixed 2 asians(blowout), 2 darkish, 2 asians, hot white girl)

Bamboo (2 hot Asians(blowout), jenny, emma, franny’s hot chic(friend pulled away), asian blonde, jealous bf chic, leaving 2 set, Canberra girl, 3 Melbourne)

Nightride (Sonia-2 asians)

***************************************************************

Area to focus on:
*venue changing
*consistent make out

Difference

Difference

when its normal, i'm calibrating my every move. I dont wanna appear loserish or needy or wotever

Her: 'My friends went to sit down, I need to go see my friends'
Me: (not on) 'oh ok, have a good night'
Me: (on) 'so u r gonna leave me all alone (sad face)...no u r not leaving me here. (hold her hands)'...she stays.

i think that's the fundamental difference.
when i get drunk. i say exactly what i want to say without worrying about or going into my head to think if its needy or loserish. I js say it. and become I have to balls to js be genuine/acting thro my own intentions, its ALWAYS on.

I hate opinion openers. and I really LIKE compliments. it makes them happy. it makes me happy.

oh god i love girls.

with Vi, as i was getting her number i saw chris holding her and kissing her. but becoz i was in state, i was unstifled. and she was into it. Chris whispers somethign into her ears. she doesnt even hear him. I'm looking for my new target already. that's the difference.

I love VNRL. I love girls. I love my life. I hate uni. hahaha peace out.

Reflections
*criteria for success
My criteria for success has drastically changed. Thus causing it harder for me to get into state.

It would have blown my mind and put me into state if I had the balls to open with any of the shit that i opened with last night.

Although at times I get discourage and whatever, I think I've come a long way. If I take any of the 10minutes or any of the approaches I did last night, and rewind 2yrs. I think it wld have been the BEST NIGHT of my life.

Key when not in state is to lower that criteria of success to maybe just opening. and think about 2yrs or something. and once I reach it, it'll allow me to go into state. All uphill from there.

Last night, i had a lot of aa initially. i had watched tyler's clip on how to get 30sec makeouts. and i wanted one. i had set the criteria to getting a makeout, i pysched myself out.

*venue change
Remember to do. builds trust massively

*alcohol
its great, but need to get off it.
only drink it after i get into state already

b4, i didnt claw much, i was stifled and i was trying to constantly calibrate.
after, i took what i want.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I don't know if its the alcohol, the redbull or whatever. but last night I maintained state for a long ass time. I didnt wanna leave the club.

last week, I also hit state, but it lasted maybe 1hr before it started to slowly dwindle. I dun know if it was coz i was physically tired, but i got this feeling like it was 'enough' and i didnt feel like doing it anymore

last night. if it wasnt for your ride home. (thank you for driving me home.) I wld have stayed till it closed and tried to make out wiv every girl there.


Ruminations

When i'm a lil tipsy and my nimbus comes thro

I realise i'm very

1. dominant - the claw is strong and firm. prob js as strong as sonic. i dont let them go
2. sweet talk - i sweet talk so much, which i never do when i'm not. I know i'm getting a fuckload of A when i'm doing that, but problems are 1. i need to do it when i'm sober. 2. now i'm not sure if its all that good, am i sacrificing trust to get A.

A convo

Guess it shows i'm going places.

tim7am says:
u know wot
tim7am says:
i feel really bad for girls now
China Jen! says:
y?
tim7am says:
for a guy, if he sees a chic he likes, he has the duty, the obligation and the right to go chat her up
tim7am says:
for a girl, if she sees a guy she likes, she has to wait around in the vicinity and wait aorund hoping that he'd come up
China Jen! says:
yea i know eyyy
China Jen! says:
thats why i wish i was a guy sometimes
China Jen! says:
its just so much easier and more straight forward
tim7am says:
yeah sooo much easier
China Jen! says:
how did u arrive at this new revelation
tim7am says:
haha i guess i'm growing
China Jen! says:
wtf
China Jen! says:
lol
China Jen! says:
how can u say thats growing
tim7am says:
i've having these random realisations all the time now
China Jen! says:
yea iguess u r a guy
tim7am says:
like why i want a hot chic
China Jen! says:
thats y this never occured to u
tim7am says:
wot? like waiting around hoping he'll come n talk to u
China Jen! says:
yea
tim7am says:
wot signals do u give off
tim7am says:
i'll watch out for it
China Jen! says:
just lookat u i guess
China Jen! says:
like sneak peaks
China Jen! says:
*peeks
China Jen! says:
n smile maybe
tim7am says:
haha i had that yday
China Jen! says:
just positive body language
China Jen! says:
not that hard to pick up
China Jen! says:
but then again
China Jen! says:
some girls just like guys coming up to them
China Jen! says:
to boost ego
China Jen! says:
haha
tim7am says:
yeah of coz
tim7am says:
but guys have so much more choice
China Jen! says:
guys are the predators
tim7am says:
yeah, i know
China Jen! says:
n al girls can do is wait around
China Jen! says:
girls can approach too i guess
China Jen! says:
but...the guy prob wouldnt end up being very much into u
China Jen! says:
if itall came so effortless
tim7am says:
yeah exactly
tim7am says:
only very confident girls can approach
tim7am says:
but its not the social norm
China Jen! says:
yea
China Jen! says:
a guy is hardly ever worth pursuing
tim7am says:
for a guy its so different
tim7am says:
u r at a club, u might as well js hit on girls
tim7am says:
and i know why cool guys are not needy
tim7am says:
coz if the chic didnt pick up or call back same day, he js goes out and gets another girl
tim7am says:
like one of his choosing
tim7am says:
might not be 1st choice, but one he chooses nevertheless
tim7am says:
girls...js have to pick one out of those who come up to her
tim7am says:
no choice
China Jen! says:
yea the choice is very limited
China Jen! says:
finally realises our pain and suffering
China Jen! says:
n if u r not hot
China Jen! says:
u literally have no choice
China Jen! says:
cos ppl dont even come up to u
tim7am says:
haha i know. i'm so insightful
tim7am says:
if u r not hot, and some guy does come up to u...u freeze up, or u know he js wants to get an easy lay and prob wont call u again.
China Jen! says:
yea wish it was acceptable for a girl to pick up guys
tim7am says:
haha but dont worry abt
China Jen! says:
that would make clubbing so much more fun

Repetition

Reptition is mother of all skills. I just gotta man up.

- Keep training
- Keep approaching
- Keep reading

Woah

Training Muscles

Just like how muscles getting bigger by putting them under stress and breaking the molecular chains. Your sense of core self gets stronger by constantly having your reality broken.

This has meaning in 2 fold.

1. By putting myself in situations or situations outside your comfort zone, and trying you things. You are more likely to break your own reality and see things and understand new truths which were previously outside your RAS. This will cause you to become more of a man and do things which you previous thought were never possible.
2. By putting yourself out there and getting 'rejected', you are breaking those chain and making yourself strong mentally. To the point where you 100% fully recognize that its okay. that you don't have to give a fuck. That rejection is no big deal. I don't care about it.
   

Peace out,

Day 2

I am too lazy to go to the Gym. I have self rationalized that it takes 20minutes to walk to the Gym so therefore I'm going to wait until I get the car before I go.

I don't think that's a good thing because chances are I am going to waste that 20minutes anyway. But will I waste a further 20minutes if i do indeed walk to the Gym now?

Epiphanies

ROLL OFF

• You don't have to talk all the time
• Let her reinitiate when you know its ON.
• Lock downs
• 3 minutes - show your alpha style
• Smile when you approach
  
• Styles
  
• Clubs - Cocky funny
• Day - Genuine
• PUSH PULL 2 steps forward 1 step back
  

The journey

Perhaps this is late. But late is better than never.
I will record my journey as I go to see how far. I think I have come a long way from the day of high school. Perhaps it is important to dig up some of these articles and have a read of them to see really how far I have come when I am depressed.

Either way, I am going to list my long term goals, my intermediate goals and my short term goals.

Long Term Goals

• Become a man
• Be in the best shape I possibly can
• Be in a job you enjoy
• Be happy
• Be able to walk up to any girl I want and get her

Intermediate Goals

• Get into shape, get a great body
• Get Distinction Average
• Get consistent makeouts and a fclose

Short Term Goals

• Catch up for uni
• Go out 3 times a week, get one day2 a week, do 5 daygame approach a week
• Go to the Gym 5 times a week
• Watch Blueprint
• Read about trading
  

Gurus are just different. For now there are 2 things to work on

• outer game, materials to learn etc
• inner game, deep identity change

The key is not how hard you can hit.

The key is how hard you can get hit, fall to the ground and get back up.

Mindset

1. I don't give a fuck what anyone thinks of me
2. I have to work on my personality and not my reputation
3. I have to treat everyone as equal, to learn to judge nobody